“Our first date seemed to be going so well, why haven’t I heard from him??”

If you find yourself making this statement after the otherwise “perfect first date” then it’s a good idea to take a look at your dating behaviors, any red flags about the guys you are dating or if it might be time for you to have a “first date makeover.” Many of us think we know all of the first date rules because, after all, we are women and we analyze “everything.” The problem is we aren’t always right especially when it comes to our behavior on a first date. These “behaviors” are often the ones our friends also may be reluctant to tell us, so we need to rethink our otherwise perfect moves on a first date and take a look at exactly what will make a nice guy, and potential Mr. Right, vanish after the first date.

No –Nos:

Lies. Plain and simple don’t lie about your appearance or your life with respect to significant aspects, ie., kids, a job, appearance, etc. If you have been “less than truthful” prior to the date about any of the above and think you can repair this lie in the first date forget it. Nothing says “stay away” for a guy like a woman who is deceptive.

High-Maintenance: The restaurant is fine but could have been better, and you verbalize this. The food is wrong, the table is wrong, and forget about the atmosphere. If you share all of this with your date then this signals to him that you are high-maintenance and hard to please and a complete turn-off.

Non-stop chatter. Conversation is great but not allowing your date to get a word in is a major turn off. Equally undesirable is a woman who has absolutely nothing to say, and it’s like pulling teeth for your date. Speak openly but let him talk too!

Ex-boyfriend talk. Avoid talking about your ex if at all possible. If it slips out don’t worry about it but if you start talking about your ex, telling stories about things the two of you did, or even negative chatter about him this is a major signal to your date that you are still into your ex.

Talk about what kind of wedding the two of you will have. Commitment is fine but if you are on your first date and are starting to talk about what the two of your kids will look like, and where to get married, then your date will flee from that date never to be seen or heard from again. Tread lightly on your first date and don’t’ talk about any major commitments that you might be wanting with this guy, even if you feel an automatic love connection. Nice guys are great but your date will run away if he thinks he is being cornered into instant “husband, or daddy.” Cool your heels ladies and save that talk for a future date, many dates down the road.

As always, please share your feedback or first date experiences with our readers!

Okay ladies, I think we all might need a reminder as to what guys really want in a woman. Even though we’ve talked about this stuff before for some reason we seem to forget or stop doing what works and think we know best when it comes to guys. Well we don’t because we are girls so tune in for the reshresher:

Avoid the negativity. Guys simply do not want to spend time with a woman who has a constant negative attitude and criticizes everything. Of course everyone has his or her good and bad days but if you are sporting a negative “Debbie downer-like” attitude 24/7 your guy will lose interest – regardless as to how hot you might look.

Don’t speak badly about your body or your appearance. Guys love a confident woman. Not cocky or arrogant, but confident. This pretty much goes for both sexes but all guys you talk to will tell you that a woman who is comfortable with herself and her body is a real turn on. If you are critical of yourself then it’s time to work on accepting and loving yourself. If you do that then that love can be contagious.

Skip the work or friend gossip and save that conversation for your girlfriends. Guys don’t have or want to have the attention span to listen to us babble on and on about what “Susie” did at dance class, or what “Barbara” said to her sister. They aren’t interested so skip that conversation if you want to hold your guy’s interest.

Show off your “smarts.” It’s a myth that most guys like a girl to play dumb. Guys like a girl who uses her brain confidently. You don’t need to be rocket scientist but be comfortable talking about the things you know and the response from your guy may surprise you in a very positive way.

Guys like it when a girl is self-sufficient. If you can take care of yourself financially and are independent guys will admire you for it.

Guys are attracted to your smell. Yes we said it, they like the way women smell, usually after a shower especially with fresh shampooed hair. Trust me, I’ve asked them and this is what they tell me. Although they love a pretty floral scent there’s something like the au-natural scent of a woman that turns a guy on (may go hand in hand with wearing his dress shirt and donning a baseball cap) – we’re still working on that research !

Share your thoughts guys on anything else you like in a woman!